I'm a horrible friend.
I completely neglected to tell you all, that Wendi baked me a chocolate cheesecake!!!
Hubby and I (after tucking in the kids) dug into it last night! YUUUUUUUUMMMMM!!!!
Thank you Wendi! It was DELISH!!!!!!!
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Happy Birthdays
Today we had Wendi and the boys over for dinner and cake. I made homemade lasagna and NGN made cheesy garlic bread and salad.
After dinner, we tried to yell over the throngs of children who were infesting the house. Poor Wendi kept trying to do things. I tried and tried to tell her to STOP helping. Jeeze, the woman wanted to clean the table after dinner! NO WAY!!!
It was nice to have them here.
I made her a cake and she neglected to bring her wonderful new camera to take a pic, so I told her that I'd post one here.
So...here's a couple of Wendi's bday cake.
Hubby and I celebrated our bdays last weekend. I'd made him a homemade apple pie. We went to the Georgetowne Inn and ate so much food that I thought I'd die! Then, when the waitress was serving dessert, the fireworks started over PNC park. It was a really nice time. Next day, he made me chicken cacciatore from scratch and we had ice cream cake for dessert.
I also got to go and see Wicked on the 14th. CL took me for my birthday. IT WAS BEYOND AMAZING! I have seen MANY musicals in my life, both movies, and in theaters. This was my VERY favorite BY FAR! If I was given the option of picking ANY role in ANY musical for me to play, I'd choose Elphaba from Wicked. JUST AMAZING! The story exceeded every expectation I had. It cannot be easy to take such a well known and loved story, and create a prequel to it. I do not even have the words to express how impressive it was. I've NEVER left a theater thinking "I'd watch that again...RIGHT NOW!", but I did with Wicked.
If it comes back to PGH, GO!!!!!!!!
After dinner, we tried to yell over the throngs of children who were infesting the house. Poor Wendi kept trying to do things. I tried and tried to tell her to STOP helping. Jeeze, the woman wanted to clean the table after dinner! NO WAY!!!
It was nice to have them here.
I made her a cake and she neglected to bring her wonderful new camera to take a pic, so I told her that I'd post one here.
So...here's a couple of Wendi's bday cake.
Hubby and I celebrated our bdays last weekend. I'd made him a homemade apple pie. We went to the Georgetowne Inn and ate so much food that I thought I'd die! Then, when the waitress was serving dessert, the fireworks started over PNC park. It was a really nice time. Next day, he made me chicken cacciatore from scratch and we had ice cream cake for dessert.
I also got to go and see Wicked on the 14th. CL took me for my birthday. IT WAS BEYOND AMAZING! I have seen MANY musicals in my life, both movies, and in theaters. This was my VERY favorite BY FAR! If I was given the option of picking ANY role in ANY musical for me to play, I'd choose Elphaba from Wicked. JUST AMAZING! The story exceeded every expectation I had. It cannot be easy to take such a well known and loved story, and create a prequel to it. I do not even have the words to express how impressive it was. I've NEVER left a theater thinking "I'd watch that again...RIGHT NOW!", but I did with Wicked.
If it comes back to PGH, GO!!!!!!!!
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
2 years
Two years ago today, I watched a nurse take down the medications that helped my dad live, and put up a bag of Morphine to help him die. He wasn't aware. We made the decision for him. That was his wish though. We all knew it was time.
So many people huddled in the ICU room. The priest reading scripture. Everyone just waiting. He laid motionless...but breathing.
It was the most excruciating thing I've ever experienced.
Next morning, he was up eating breakfast. We all were thinking we had been wrong to take him off his meds and start the Morphine. The doctors talked with my dad, who was now fully aware, and he said he was ready. That this was what he wanted. He was done being in constant pain. He was done.
My sister Lynn would call every morning with the "Morning report" to let me know what the status was. Every morning that passed that she said "He's still here" we laughed harder. It was crazy.
We all got to talk with dad. He lived for 13 days on hospice.
I cannot tell you how many times I left his side believing it would be my last time. Saying "goodbye, I love you daddy" and thinking I'd never have the chance again.
It was one hell of a two week period for everyone as he slowly dwindled into death.
How hard it was to request the Morphine be bumped up again.
How hard it was to watch the nurses believe we wanted to kill him faster. Not believing he was in pain.
We knew my daddy.
It wasn't until he forced the words "ALWAYS IN PAIN" out, that they even believed us.
Bastards.
He was finally moved to a hospice facility a couple days before he died. The hospital nurses just didn't understand.
Hospice was amazing.
I never saw him there. I'd said one too many "goodbyes" and I just couldn't go anymore. I know he understood. It was only two days.
I sent messages through my sister. I know he got them.
My daddy never gave up. That was important to him. I believe he suffered SO long because he believed that we weren't ready.
Hell, I'm still not ready for him to be gone. But, I wouldn't trade one more minute with him here, for the pain he endured for me.
Daddy,
I miss you everyday. I can hear your laugh. I can see your smile. I am still your babydoll.
You are my heart.
I miss you terribly, today and every day.
I love you,
Bess
So many people huddled in the ICU room. The priest reading scripture. Everyone just waiting. He laid motionless...but breathing.
It was the most excruciating thing I've ever experienced.
Next morning, he was up eating breakfast. We all were thinking we had been wrong to take him off his meds and start the Morphine. The doctors talked with my dad, who was now fully aware, and he said he was ready. That this was what he wanted. He was done being in constant pain. He was done.
My sister Lynn would call every morning with the "Morning report" to let me know what the status was. Every morning that passed that she said "He's still here" we laughed harder. It was crazy.
We all got to talk with dad. He lived for 13 days on hospice.
I cannot tell you how many times I left his side believing it would be my last time. Saying "goodbye, I love you daddy" and thinking I'd never have the chance again.
It was one hell of a two week period for everyone as he slowly dwindled into death.
How hard it was to request the Morphine be bumped up again.
How hard it was to watch the nurses believe we wanted to kill him faster. Not believing he was in pain.
We knew my daddy.
It wasn't until he forced the words "ALWAYS IN PAIN" out, that they even believed us.
Bastards.
He was finally moved to a hospice facility a couple days before he died. The hospital nurses just didn't understand.
Hospice was amazing.
I never saw him there. I'd said one too many "goodbyes" and I just couldn't go anymore. I know he understood. It was only two days.
I sent messages through my sister. I know he got them.
My daddy never gave up. That was important to him. I believe he suffered SO long because he believed that we weren't ready.
Hell, I'm still not ready for him to be gone. But, I wouldn't trade one more minute with him here, for the pain he endured for me.
Daddy,
I miss you everyday. I can hear your laugh. I can see your smile. I am still your babydoll.
You are my heart.
I miss you terribly, today and every day.
I love you,
Bess
Monday, September 15, 2008
Lame
I've been lame. I know. Truth is, this time of year is crazy weird for me. New schedules, new stresses, old memories.
I'm trying to focus on the bests. On the kids doing well. On the positive things around me. There are many positives.
Some days it's just harder than others.
With the anniversary of Lori's death just a couple weeks ago, the anniversary of my dad's death now looms over me.
My birthday is hard.
I dreamed the other night that my dad couldn't come to my birthday and I was so sad.
He's connected SO strongly with it for me.
He was put on hospice only a few days prior to my 38th birthday. I was sure he wouldn't allow himself to die on my birthday. I was right. So, on that day, lacking the energy to bake, I went to Giant Eagle and bought myself a cake.
I took it to the hospital with plates and forks to celebrate, what I knew would be, my last birthday with my daddy.
He was weak but 100% aware and was able to celebrate with me.
I got to feed him cake.
It was an honor to share that day with him. I can't even tell you who else was in the room. I know my mom was there.
It really didn't matter. I just knew that I had an opportunity to hate my birthday forever, or make the day as special as possible by letting it be good, in spite of the knowledge that he'd be gone soon.
He died on the 30th. Two years ago.
I miss him more than I can even describe.
I know he's with me. There are days, like today, that I'd almost do anything to hear his voice or hear him call me "Bess" or "toots" again.
Daddys are something so incredibly special. But, anyone who knew him would have no problem telling you, he was beyond special. He was amazing.
I'll miss him forever.
♥
I'm trying to focus on the bests. On the kids doing well. On the positive things around me. There are many positives.
Some days it's just harder than others.
With the anniversary of Lori's death just a couple weeks ago, the anniversary of my dad's death now looms over me.
My birthday is hard.
I dreamed the other night that my dad couldn't come to my birthday and I was so sad.
He's connected SO strongly with it for me.
He was put on hospice only a few days prior to my 38th birthday. I was sure he wouldn't allow himself to die on my birthday. I was right. So, on that day, lacking the energy to bake, I went to Giant Eagle and bought myself a cake.
I took it to the hospital with plates and forks to celebrate, what I knew would be, my last birthday with my daddy.
He was weak but 100% aware and was able to celebrate with me.
I got to feed him cake.
It was an honor to share that day with him. I can't even tell you who else was in the room. I know my mom was there.
It really didn't matter. I just knew that I had an opportunity to hate my birthday forever, or make the day as special as possible by letting it be good, in spite of the knowledge that he'd be gone soon.
He died on the 30th. Two years ago.
I miss him more than I can even describe.
I know he's with me. There are days, like today, that I'd almost do anything to hear his voice or hear him call me "Bess" or "toots" again.
Daddys are something so incredibly special. But, anyone who knew him would have no problem telling you, he was beyond special. He was amazing.
I'll miss him forever.
♥
Sunday, September 7, 2008
walking
So, about 18 months ago, I started taking "walks". I seem to go through ruts where I skip out for a while. I've been in one of those ruts. Today, I walked. 50 minutes of just me and Daughtry! It's my favorite CD for my walks. I feel energized and healthier. I remember how good it feels to stretch and MOVE!
I still want to swim. It feels the least like "exercising" to me. I'll get there in time. But, in light of my now, 25lb weight loss, I feel I should move more again.
So, I am recommitting to walking or using the elliptical 3/week.
See, if I have to go on vacation with you skinny ladies next summer, I gotta WORK IT NOW!!! ;)
I still want to swim. It feels the least like "exercising" to me. I'll get there in time. But, in light of my now, 25lb weight loss, I feel I should move more again.
So, I am recommitting to walking or using the elliptical 3/week.
See, if I have to go on vacation with you skinny ladies next summer, I gotta WORK IT NOW!!! ;)
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
No Bake Cookies (AKA Preacher Cookies)
2C sugar
1/4 lb margarine
2/3 C milk
6 TBS cocoa
Mix together in large saucepan. Bring to a boil, and allow to boil for 5 full minutes. Whisk constantly.
Remove from heat.
Add in 3/4 C peanut butter (or coconut)
3 C oats
1 tsp vanilla
Drop onto waxed paper by the TBS and allow to cool so Jimmy doesn't burn his mouth.
Enjoy! :)
1/4 lb margarine
2/3 C milk
6 TBS cocoa
Mix together in large saucepan. Bring to a boil, and allow to boil for 5 full minutes. Whisk constantly.
Remove from heat.
Add in 3/4 C peanut butter (or coconut)
3 C oats
1 tsp vanilla
Drop onto waxed paper by the TBS and allow to cool so Jimmy doesn't burn his mouth.
Enjoy! :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)