3 days

In the past three days, I've done more than I probably have in the past month. Feeling I need to get my things in order has become important to me.
For the first time in my married life, I feel free to make my own decisions about how I run this house. I don't have to be concerned that I didn't do enough. I don't have to worry that someone is angry that I got Wendy's instead of cooking.
I can do what I please. My step is confident in this house now. I'm not living up to anyone else's expectations. I'm living up to what I feel is best for my sons.
No more worrying that it isn't enough. That it isn't right. That I'll hear that I did nothing.

I can now focus on what is truly important. Not the overwhelming tone of negativity and disapproval.

These past three days have been hell.

These past three days have made me feel that I can do this.

That I will succeed.

That no matter what possessions change hands, I have my sons and they are happy with me.

I washed all of their bedding today. They all thanked me and were excited to sleep on clean fresh sheets.

There's something about going to bed in the comfort of clean sheets, that makes you just feel secure. I want them to feel secure.

They may not remember that I washed their sheets three days after dad left, but I will.